Emotions Live in the Body: Feeling Safely Instead of Getting Stuck

By Nisarga Eryk Dobosz · 27 October 2026

We are all born with the ability to feel. It is not something we have to learn – it is the very essence of being human. And our emotions are never still. Like the seasons here in Estonia, they change all the time: from fear to anger, from sadness to joy, from dark winter to bright midsummer and back again.

This movement is natural. The cycle is the same for all of us, but how long each emotion lasts and how strongly we feel it depends on our personality and on what life has brought us. When we come back to the present moment – here and now, in the body – we come back to the heart. And this is where happiness lives.

How we learn to stop feeling

From the very first years of life, we learn which emotions are welcome and which are not. A child quickly notices: when I laugh, people smile. When I cry, maybe someone gets nervous. When I am angry, I am sent to my room.

To stay loved and to belong, we start to hide parts of ourselves. "Big boys don't cry." "Don't be so dramatic." "Be a good girl."

Over the years this suppression becomes automatic. We lose the ability to fully feel and express, especially the feelings connected to painful experiences – whether developmental trauma (what happened slowly, over years of childhood) or shock trauma (a sudden event such as an accident, loss or violence).

Is expressing emotions always good?

This is an important question. The honest answer is: not always.

To understand why, let's look at the autonomic nervous system. When something reminds the body of an old threat, the nervous system reacts automatically with one of three survival responses: fight, flight or freeze. In trauma work we sometimes call this being pulled into a "trauma vortex". The same grief, the same anger, the same fear repeat again and again – even when there is no real danger now.

Just shouting out anger or crying for hours does not necessarily heal this. Sometimes it only deepens the groove.

From the vortex to the present

The key is to recognise the quality of the emotion. Is this a fresh, primary feeling about what is happening now? Or is it an old, "triggered" reaction pulling me into the past?

When we notice we are in the vortex, we gently guide ourselves – or the client we work with – back to stability. Back to resources in the body: the feet on the floor, the breath, the warmth of a hand, the room around us. Back to the safety of the present moment.

Something interesting happens then. The emotional wave becomes smaller and more manageable. It may be the same emotion – the same sadness – but now it rises in a safe space, and we can experience it differently. Instead of drowning, we ride the wave. Each time this happens, the nervous system builds a little more resilience.

This is what I mean by emotional integration: not getting rid of feelings, but being able to feel them fully while staying present.

My own path

Many years ago my own spiritual search started from a very simple wish: I wanted to feel again. My life had become grey, disconnected and empty. On the outside everything was "fine", but inside I felt nothing.

So I made a decision to look at my childhood wounds and to reconnect with my real emotions. That journey brought me to meditation, to breathwork, to bodywork – and eventually to the work I do today with Biodynamic Breathwork & Trauma Release System (BBTRS) and Myofascial Energetic Release (MER).

Maybe you recognise yourself in this. Maybe you also feel called to this journey.

A small practice

Try this now, for one minute:

• Close your eyes and bring your attention to your body and your breath.
• Ask yourself softly: what am I feeling right now?
• Don't look for the right answer. Maybe it is tiredness, maybe tension in the chest, maybe nothing clear.
• Feel your feet on the ground and let the breath be slow.
• Whatever is there, say inside: this is welcome.

From moment to moment, allow yourself to feel and express what is true – in an honest and loving way.

What I have seen

For 25 years as a bodywork therapist, and as a breathwork facilitator since 2009, I have worked with thousands of people, in Tallinn and in many countries. Again and again I see the same thing: when people open the door to authentic emotional expression, and meet their feelings with compassion instead of judgement, life starts to respond. Relationships become warmer. The body relaxes. Sleep often improves. There is more energy and colour.

This work is not a replacement for psychotherapy or medical care when they are needed – it can beautifully complement them.

Your emotions, felt in the safety of your body, are the doorway to your true self. If you would like support on this path, our breathwork sessions and BBTRS trainings at the Body Awareness Institute in Estonia are a safe place to begin.

Nisarga Eryk Dobosz is a bodyworker and trainer (BBTRS®, MER®, BCST, Lomi Lomi) and founder of the Body Awareness Institute. This article is for education and self-care. It is not medical advice and does not replace care from a doctor or therapist.